“There are wounds that even magic can’t heal, but.. Even though it was painful to hear you talk about it, it was okay. That part was okay”.
Another evening spent staring at quotes to inspire him and to motivate him to move forward to move on.. As he scrolled to different sites, watching videos and just brain storming.. Hours passed and yet he was still there sitting.. With a blank expression. He wasn’t depressed scared or happy, he was nothing. He searched through the web to find something to relate to, to have some meaning in his life, but nothing grabbed his attention.. So as every other day he succumbed to his one way of being peaceful.
He scrolled through his Playlist, grabbed his earphones plugged them in, he started the song, after the few words of the song he slowly increased the volume to max. It’s different.. When you slowly turn the volume up, you can feel the world going silent and the melody taking over your reality, he tried closing his eyes, but the demons were waiting for him so he couldn’t, he learned to dream with eyes open, to sleep while looking wide awake, he has perfected the art of getting the better of his own self.. His demons.
The melody, it was the only thing that felt real now, as everything else had crumbled away slowly. This was his only way to have his me time, without being something else he wasn’t meant to be or he didn’t want to be. He doesn’t remember the lyrics to half the songs he has, he doesn’t remember the exact beats that are gonna follow through, it’s just a melody which helps him create his own little world slowly with his eyes open. He was used to this, he had found a way to run away whilst staying there..
The scars, the wounds and the regrets aren’t going anywhere, they will hurt everytime he will try to touch it, and even though he knows that all too much, he still takes them with him, he has not being held behind by his part, he is looking forward to the future, but its heavy.. It’ll keep getting heavy and the only thing helping him forward.. Are melodies He don’t even remember aftwr they are done, cause he doesn’t listen to them or feel them.. They are nothing but an excuse to cut off from everything else, they are like earbuds.. But he doesn’t like silence.. Silence screams louder than words can.. Melodies don’t scream, they flow like a river, you can relate to them, you can ignore them, but it’ll keep flowing like time or water..
He doesn’t know when, but melodies became an indispensable part of his life.. He can’t live without them.. He is addicted (: